I am so done with this band.
Like look at fucking Chris Martin stretching his leg higher than the Empire State building. He looks like a damn ballet and he’s so freaking tall it’s unreal. Like no. You can’t be THAT attractive even when you are dumb.
Then you have Guy …. stupidly following his babe and doing some duck dance. What are you doing you idiot. Don’t. DON’T. And he’s like ‘nom nom nom, let’s ruin some lives today’.
Here comes Will. I love how he’s like ‘what the actual fuck I am doing here with this band’ ‘I should have drink a tea this morning because I need to pee’ And he’s so adorably shy like, ‘anyway, no one is gonna watch this so i’m not gonna bother’ ‘plus no one knows my existence or my name’
And then you have the dumbest of the lot. Fucking Jonny Buckland doing I don’t know what. He’s like ‘fuck, Chris and Guy did some awesome stuff, I need to make something even more stupid’. You can only see his ass and and STOP. ABORPT MISSION. RUDE RUDE RUDE.
Actually, I just resumed this band. Chris aka ‘Idiot’ Martin. Guy ‘Life Ruiner’ Berryman, Will ‘OMG, SOMEONE IS LOOKING AT ME’ Champion and Jonny ‘Dumb Because Chris Is’ Buckland.